Sunday, May 5, 2024

Nobody Reads This Page – “Kentucky Kernel”


 


c. 2024 Rod Ice

All rights reserved

(5-24)

 

 

The recent anniversary of tragic events at Kent State University caused a moment of reflection for this writer. While many bowed their heads and remembered, others made online posts about the Star Wars movie franchise. Yet at my desk, the mood was somber. For many, what transpired on the campus in May of 1970 was a benchmark for the entire generation. A point reached where unarmed students met the fate of battlefield combatants. I remember a friend observing later, in New York, that he and others who were immersed in hippie culture at the time literally thought that they all might be exterminated in a similar fashion. But in my own life, the yield of this awful happening was more subdued and complex to process.

 

I was eight years old when William Schroeder, Alison Krause, Jeffrey Miller, and Sandra Lee Scheuer were felled by National Guard bullets.

 

In the Ice household, reading our local paper, and watching daily news broadcasts, was a family tradition. My maternal grandmother had a particular interest in staying informed. My father always caught the morning shows while having his coffee. As a young pupil in eastern Kentucky, I went to a school located in a district so poor and remote that my third-grade studies commenced each weekday in a trailer behind the actual building. I was too young to be self-conscious about this obvious token of poverty. When gunfire ripped through the air in my native Ohio, I took it as a bout of adult violence that made no sense. Hearing that kids who were busy working on their education had been struck down, had me stunned and befuddled. Being so naïve and youthful, I equated the four with members of my own class at Owingsville Elementary.

 

With an earnest desire to understand, I asked my father about what had occurred. He was a stout fellow with a solid education, and a calling as a Christian minister. A lifelong Republican. Someone who had voted both for Richard Nixon, and Buckeye Governor Jim Rhodes. So, my innocent query must have caused his stomach to quiver uncomfortably. I recollect that he paused thoughtfully before offering a wise assessment.

 

“Man may err in his beliefs or in his conduct. But God is always on his throne of grace. It is important to remember that, Rodney. At the end of time, it is his hands that will still cradle the world.”

 

My concept of soldiers was dictated in that gentle era by green, plastic Army men who populated our backyard when I played with friends. I was more concerned with riding my Schwinn banana-bike, and finding 45-rpm records at our local five & dime store, downtown. One of those was a single by the iconic, but largely unknown, Jim Ford. A native of the Bluegrass State who was expressive and talented, yet not destined to linger long as a figure in the world of popular music. I had so little life experience under my belt, that comprehending the conflict in Vietnam, and the unrest percolating across America, overwhelmed my budding intellect.

 

My mother and her side of our brood were all old-fashioned Democrats, who sprung from the soil of Appalachia. She stayed busy with the rigorous duties of running our home. But Grandma McCray, who was her own mater, had plenty of love and affection as I struggled with this dark point on the calendar. She was content to let me talk freely, and explore my nerdy sense of wonder. Then, offered assurance that I would always be protected by our benevolent creator.

 

“You will never be alone, child. It says that in the holy scriptures, in Matthew 28. “And lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen.”

 

Grandma was a poet who frequently offered her humble vision of life in compositions of creative verse. She once received a letter from Eleanor Roosevelt, thanking her for material written in support of her husband, our 32nd President of the United States. I trusted her every word without question. Because, while I knew that the admonitions of others were grounded in fact and reason, I could feel what she spoke in my heart. Everything that fell from her lips resonated at my core. Her spirit and insight provided fertile soil from which I would grow, and prosper, for decades to come.

 

After the shootings, Neil Young’s classic ‘Ohio’ was an anthem that would strike with the force of a lightning bolt. A talisman of distant lands which I did not inhabit or tread. As a product of Columbus and the river region below, my experience had little to offer with any sophistication. I knew of our military operations overseas, and about the counterculture pushback of some who were aligned differently in social and political terms. But this awareness came through the peering eyes of a virtual baby. I watched Beatles cartoons on our TV set, a colorless receiver bought from the Sears & Roebuck catalog. I listened to vinyl platters on our hi-fi, also vended by that same noted retailer. But cultural references echoed like a screeching of anonymous birds in the treetops. I had no frame of reference. Only the radio provided a link to what awaited, beyond.

 

The song about Kent State had an unintended effect against this backdrop, in personal terms. It wracked me with a measure of guilt. I was after all, a son of the loam. Sprouted from a seed planted in the capital itself. I also had the lessons and platitudes of a conservative consciousness instilled into my head. My identity, my concept of existing, had been predetermined by this reality. So, how could I put those factors together, while yearning to be a fully-formed participant in our national traditions?

 

This conundrum would stay with me for many years that followed.

 

Sometimes, I stayed up late, with my transistor device hooked to its earphone. And a blanket over my head, to cover up this sin of being awake beyond designated hours. Music beckoned for me to enter this shadowy realm, at first. But eventually talk radio, like the ramblings of Herb Jepko on his syndicated ‘Nitecap’ program, opened new vistas to be sampled. I tuned in on affiliate WHAS, in Louisville. Through the tutelage of this long-distance education, I began to learn about things beyond the guardrails of my family and faith. The process was one that inspired a lively debate, at home, and within myself. A continuing process of evolution, and renewal. My Kentucky kernel of wisdom offered a bumper crop of enlightenment that I continue to harvest, even now.

 

It all began with the daily news, in 1970.

 

 


 

Saturday, May 4, 2024

Trailer Park Vignettes – “Intifada, Part Four”


 


c. 2024 Rod Ice

All rights reserved

(5-24)

 

 

Mama Molene Gant stayed busy over the weekend at her non-profit headquarters by Lake Erie. She still felt perturbed about the apparent withdrawal of her former student and promising advocate, Darcy Trelane, from their social circle. The former protest leader was now in her 70’s and had schooled along generations of counterculture activists since the Vietnam era. But her pupil who lived on the cheap, in a mobile home, had become a genuine disappointment. Someone she no longer recognized as a member of her extended family.

 

The gray-haired, hippie matron complained loudly to her office staff, while sipping Chai tea in the morning. Her nerves were frayed.

 

“YA COULDN’T HAVE CONVINCED ME THIS’D HAPPEN, NAW! NOT THAT GIRL WITH THA POINDEXTER GLASSES! SHE’S BEEN A STRAIGHT-UP SISTA! WHAT HAPPENED TO HER? WHAT HAPPENED OUT THERE IN THA MAGA HINTERLAND?”

 

Her crew of volunteers were all members of LGBT groups in the Cleveland area. A shy, waif of a woman named Orchid Kozlowski stood at the side of her desk, and tried to offer comfort.

 

“Mama, I‘ve always liked Miss Dex. She reminds me of Velma Dinkley from ‘Scooby Doo, Where Are You?’ That was my favorite cartoon as a kid! My mom had it on DVD and she played those old episodes over and over. When you told us about your friend having a change of heart over displaying the Palestinian flag, I wanted to scream ‘Ruh Roh!’”

 

Molene threw a handful of Sharpie pens at the wall.

 

“YA THINK THIS BE FUNNY, RIGHT? IS IT A JOKE OR SOMETHING? WHOO, NOW I’M REALLY GETTING WORKED UP, GIRLIE!”

 

The young aide started to tremble. Her lips curled inward.

 

“What? No! Not at all, Mama! Not at all!”

 

The professional organizer flipped her long, hemp skirt with a kick, under the desk.

 

“WE GOTTA PLAN ON THIS, LADIES! WE GOTTA PLAN, PLAN, PLAN!”

 

Neal Courtier, a skinny, non-binary student still attending Tri-C, added his voice to the mix. He wore a rainbow T-shirt and fishnet leggings.

 

“Mama, don’t! Please! Don’t get all hard on her, or on us! We’re still on the bus with you! We’ll ride until the Po-Po leave our campus! Ride, ride, ride!  We’ll ride in style, I promise!”

 

Molene shook her gray curls and shrieked with irritation.

 

“THIS IS A BIG DEAL, CHILLEN! A DAMN BIG DEAL! YA THINK THIS GROOVE GOT DUG OVERNIGHT? NAW! NAW IT DIDN’T! A LOTTA FOLKS LIKE ME AND YER GRANDPARENTS DONE IT ALL! WE MARCHED IN THA STREETS! WE FOUGHT FOR SOCIAL JUSTICE! WE TOOK THE HITS FROM THA HARD-HAT LOONIES, WAVING THEIR STARS-N-STRIPES! WE DID IT! WE DID IT ALL! NOW, YA MIGHT SAY THAT WE AIN’T PART OF WHAT’S GOING ON IN THA MIDDLE EAST! YA MIGHT NOT BE FROM THOSE LANDS, NOT FROM ONE OR THA OTHER! BUT I’M TELLING YA, IT STARTS WITH PALESTINE, AND DEX TAKING DOWN THAT FLAG IN HER TRAILER WINDOW! NEXT IT’LL THA RAINBOW! THEN IT’S ANYTHING TO DO WITH PEACE, AND PROTESTING, AND JUSTICE! BLACK AND BROWN AND POOR AND WHATEVER THEY DON’T LIKE! IT’S ALL BALANCED ON THE HEAD OF A PIN! WE WON’T LET ‘EM KNOCK IT OVER!”

 

The submissive kid bowed his head and nodded.

 

“No, we won’t! We owe you, mama! We owe you everything!”

 

Their supervisor stroked her long mane, and reminisced over the decades that had passed since she started her own academic journey.

 

“WE NEED SOMEBODY! OHH, YES WE DO! WE NEED A BUNCH OF SOMEBODIES! WHO GOT THA BACKBONE TO TAKE ON THAT TRAILER CROWD IN GEAUGA COUNTY? WHO GONNA STEP UP AND SHOW THA COLORS TO THOSE TRUMP FANS IN THEIR BIG RIGS? WHO GONNA FIGHT FOR THA RIGHTS OF US ON THA WRONG SIDE OF THIS RICH-MAN’S FENCE?”

 

Orchid flushed red, which provided a stark contrast to her pale complexion.

 

“There’s a listing right on our webpage, Mama! I don’t know who put it there, but it’s for a progressive union of concerned thinkers. They call themselves the ‘Trailer Trannies & Troublemakers.’ I clicked on the link while you were talking, and it led to all kinds of event photos. Take a look! This is crazy, I like their design! It’s a long, pre-fab thingy, painted pink and purple...”

 

Molene crouched over her laptop. Suddenly, she had a new angle to ponder.

 

“WHAT’S THAT? ON OUR PAGE? LET ME SEE! WHOO, DAMN! IT’S A SINGLEWIDE TRAILER, HONEY! THAT’S WHAT THEY CALL THOSE KINDS OF LIVING SPACES! IT’S LIKE BEING IN A CATTLE CAR, I’D SHO HATE TO BE COOPED UP IN A LONGBOX MADE OUT OF PLYWOOD SHEETS! BUT IT’D BE BETTER THAN SLEEPING IN A TENT ON THA SIDEWALK, RIGHT?”

 

Neal raised his right hand, as if giving testimony in court. His nails were polished with gold glitter.

 

“Yes it would be, Mama! Hey, they used plywood for the perimeter wall at UCLA, I guess it wasn’t that bad, while they staged the campus sit-in!”

 

Their inspirational leader scrolled through pages of Drag Queens and Drag Kings, gender-fluid artists, and other non-conforming figures. There were references to a dozen parks throughout northeastern Ohio. A rating system declared which of these developments was ‘alternative friendly’ and which were known to be unsafe for anyone on the social fringe.

 

Orchid toyed with her faux-dreadlocks. They were bright blonde, and bouncy.

 

“I could call them about putting together a rally out where Miss Dex lives. You know what they say, Mama, there’s safety in numbers. I wouldn’t go out there alone, or even with a small bunch of us, but maybe if we had a crowd of supporters, that would send a message!”

 

Neal giggled and danced on his Doc Marten shoes.

 

“I bet we’d get your friend back in the ranks, Mama! She’d come to her senses! Nobody with half a brain wants to live in a place like... what is it called? Pea Green Escapes or whatever?”

 

His nymphlike helper in the office whispered and laughed.

 

“Oh my, I think you got that wrong, bruh! But it doesn’t matter, really. We can make it work, I think! I’ll get on my cell phone, right away!”

 

She hit the wrong icon, and opened her Apple Music app instead. The Clash began to perform one of their anthems, which was tagged in her playlist.

 

“This is a public service announcement

With guitar

Know your rights

All three of them

Number one

You have the right not to be killed

Murder is a crime!

Unless it was done

By a policeman or an aristocrat

Know your rights...”

 

Molene sat up straight in her roller chair. For the first time that day, she felt a surge of confidence. Finally, there was some kind of useful mischief, afoot.

 

“EVERGREEN ESTATES, BOY! THEY CALL IT EVERGREEN ESTATES! A NICE PLACE TO GET STARTED, OR TO RETIRE! LET’S GET THE BALL ROLLING! WE GOTTA LOT OF WORK TA DO BEFORE THE FREEDOM TRAIN PULLS OUT FOR THOMPSON TOWNSHIP!”

 

 


 

Thursday, May 2, 2024

Trailer Park Vignettes – “Intifada, Part Three”


 


c. 2024 Rod Ice

All rights reserved

(5-24)

 

 

Darcy Trelane’s change of heart about supporting protests by friends from Cuyahoga Community College left bad emotions behind. She had always been someone who was trusted and admired in the student body, and among graduates. But now, allies from groups of activists and artists began to question her loyalty. A lively debate ensued online, as her contacts sent memes that were edgy and vicious.

 

Harshest of all was Mama Molene Gant, a leader in the LGBT community across Cleveland. She had been known since the 1970’s as a godmother to disaffected men, women, and non-binary or genderqueer people. Her long, gray curls and hippie attire brightened any event. Yet now, she scolded her former prodigy like a schoolmaster. A window opened on the screen for a live chat as she reached out through cyberspace, from her apartment by Lake Erie.

 

“WHAT’S THE PROB, SISTA? COPS GOT YA TONGUE PINNED? I THINK LIVING OUT IN MAGA COUNTRY HAS CHANGED YER WAY OF THINKING!”

 

Miss Poindexter realized that her thick, black spectacles were fogged. She could barely read her computer monitor.

 

“Nah, c’mon now! I don’t deserve that, Mama! Nobody turned me into a house mouse! Jinkies, what a crazy thought! I’m nothing like any of the other women out here at Evergreen Estates! You’d never see me in a crop-top or a pair of Daisy Dukes!”

 

Molene cackled and shook her tangled mane like a dried-out mop head.

 

“THESE PROTESTS ARE A SPRINGBOARD! DON’T YA GET IT, GIRL? IT’S PALESTINE, THEN IT’S NORTH AFRICA, THEN EUROPE, THEN IT’S ALL THE WAY ACROSS AMERICA, COAST TO COAST! WE GOTTA FIGHT THA POWER, FO-SHO! YER GONNA BE WEARING A BONNET LIKE A HANDMAIDEN! MAYBE THAT’S THA GROOVE YA WANT, AMISH HONEY?”

 

Darcy straightened her Pokemon T-shirt which had ridden up, uncomfortably. The garment left her rounded belly half exposed.

 

“It’s complicated over there, I want to cry! But what are we doing putting up plywood walls and throwing trash at the police? There’s got to be a smarter plan, I’m all for hearing about peace and human rights! Shouldn’t we be talking about a revolution at the ballot box, instead of on campuses like ours?”

 

Her counterculture mentor squawked like a wounded goose.

 

“SISTA! GET YA MIND OFF THA TRUMP TRAIN, AND BACK WHERE IT BELONGS! I DON’T RECOGNIZE YER FACE ANYMORE! WHOO, DAMN! YA THINK ONE ELECTION’S GONNA MAKE CHANGE HAPPEN? IT’LL COME WHEN WE MARCH! IT’LL COME WHEN WE PUNCH SOME FASCISTS SQUARE IN THA MOUTH! IT’LL COME WHEN WE DEFEND OUR SCHOOLS AGAINST THA FOLKS HOLDING ALL THAT GOLD! BOO YAH!”

 

Her estranged pupil felt conflicted and confused.

 

“Yes... I mean no... I mean maybe... I don’t know what to say! This started out as a good idea. I like talking out issues and being civilized. The redneck nuts out here are creepy, though! They don’t talk much. Those hicks just shoot off their guns to make noise...”

 

Mama Molene hissed and seethed with rage.

 

“THAT’S WHY WE FIGHT, RIOT GIRL! WE FIGHT THA POWER!”

 

Darcy had been eating Greek yogurt from a cup. But suddenly, her appetite was gone.

 

“I like to fight when it’s gamer combat, you know? That kind of violence gets me juiced. But I’m not much good behind steel barricades. I mean, my arms get tired of tossing out frozen water bottles...”

 

The rebel leader shuddered with disappointment.

 

“NOT MUCH GOOD? YER A LOTTA GOOD, SISTA! TRUST ME! WELL, YA WERE UNTIL THIS THING GOT ALL SCREWY AT THE TRAILER PARK! PUTTING THE PALESTINE FLAG IN THA WINDOW WAS SUPPOSED TO BE AN ACT OF DEFIANCE! YA LOST YER NERVE! WHAT HAPPENED? WHAT TOOK AWAY THA COURAGE?”

 

Her submissive follower had to ponder before answering.

 

“It feels weird to say, but... I think the old drunk next door struck a nerve. He actually made sense, you know, Mama? That dude is a shaggy effer, all wrinkled and covered with age spots and scars... I listened to him, though. He sounded like my Polish grandpa. Someone I could trust. Maybe I needed a voice of reason?”

 

Molene shrieked with the force of a vulture swooping down on its dinner.

 

“NOOOO DAMMIT! NO! THERE’S NO REASON OUT THERE IN THA STICKS! THOSE PEOPLE ARE STRAIGHT-UP ASSHOLES! ALL CHURCHY AND MEAN AND GUN-HAPPY! SCREW THEM! DON’T TAKE A WORD THEY SAY SERIOUSLY! YA GONNA GET HOODWINKED, GIRL! LISTEN TO ME, I BEEN THERE FOR YA! I BEEN IN THE TRENCHES, FIGHTING THE PO-PO! I BEEN KNOCKED ON MY ASS BY A COP’S BATON! I BEEN IN JAIL WITH OTHER FREEDOM FIGHTERS!”

 

Darcy felt a chill run over her pale skin.

 

“Well, I don’t really want to land in jail, you know...”

 

Her role model exploded and began to smack the wall next to her laptop.

 

“YA DONE TURNED INTO A COWARD! I NEVER THOUGHT THA DAY WOULD COME! THIS REVOLUTION NEEDS SOLDIERS, HONEY! SOLDIERS ON THA FRONT LINES! FIGHTING TO FREE, FREE PALESTINE! DIVEST! SANCTION! CUT TIES WITH ENEMIES OF THA PEOPLE!”

 

Her loyalist had gone cold.

 

“Who’s an enemy? Who’s a friend? I don’t know anymore. People keep dying, little babies on both sides of the border fence. Mothers crying for their families. Fathers who have nothing left, no homes, no hope. Where’s the good in that, Mama? Does it matter to argue over guilt anymore? Over who started all this shit?”

 

The hippie icon clenched her bony fists and shook uncontrollably.

 

“THAT’S IT, WOMAN, YA DID IT NOW! I’M KICKING YER PLUMP BUTT OUT OF OUR TRIBE! YA SOLD OUT TO THA MAN! GO GET YERSELF A MAGA COWBOY! THAT’S WHERE YA BELONG, RIDING SHOTGUN IN A 4X4 PICKUP TRUCK! HOO, I NEVER THOUGHT IT’D HAPPEN! I THOUGHT YA WERE A REAL-DEAL LESBIAN TIGRESS! A HUNTER ON THA PROWL! BUT IT’S OVER NOW, ALL OVER. YA DONE CAVED TO THA TRUMPIES WITH THEIR BIBLES AND SNAKE FLAGS! SAY GOODBYE TO THE FRIENDS YA DUMPED, SISTA! WE’LL ALL BE THERE WITH OUR HELMETS AND GAS MASKS AND OUR FISTS HELD HIGH! WE AIN’T GIVING UP THE STRUGGLE! THIS IS A FIGHT TO THE END! OUR VOICES WILL BE HEARD! INTIFADA FOREVER!”

 

Darcy wanted to vomit. She clicked out of the online conversation and slumped in her roller chair. The empty yogurt container fell onto her floor, and rolled into a corner.

 

“I’m an orphan now. All I’ve got left is that cranky alcoholic next door! How the hell did this happen?”

Wednesday, May 1, 2024

Nothing To See Here – “Control”


 


c. 2024 Rod Ice

All rights reserved

(5-24)

 

 

“We are all alone, born alone, die alone, and – in spite of True Romance magazines – we shall all someday look back on our lives and see that, in spite of our company, we were alone the whole way. I do not say lonely – at least, not all the time – but essentially, and finally, alone. This is what makes your self-respect so important, and I don’t see how you can respect yourself if you must look in the hearts and minds of others for your happiness.”

                        

                                                                                                                                  – Hunter S. Thompson

 

One of the most perplexing things about my second marriage was when we reached the point where it became impossible to cover our monthly bills, even with drastic measures in effect. I had unexpectedly lost my job as a retail manager, after a company sale. This created a vacuum of sorts, as I also worked for a newspaper in Chardon, for sideline income. That labor alone would not feed my family. So, I went to interviews all over the tri-county area, submitted resumes, and eventually took a job with a second publisher of local news. Yet my weekly reward couldn’t match the amount earned before. There was only one solution to this dilemma – dumping assets and cutting costs for the household. That process put strains on our marriage, and proceeded forward in a haphazard and rough fashion. It was a frustrating exercise, not unlike trying to steer an automobile with flat tires and a sputtering engine.

 

Not being in control sent me over the edge. Both financially, and emotionally. Afterward, I vowed to never let myself fall into that chaotic state, again.

 

Years later, I was back to living alone and dependent on nothing more than my wits for survival. But having the controls in my own hands made all the difference. When another business sale found me kicked to the curb, and struggling, the bumpy ride was easier to tolerate. In part, because of previous experiences with that kind of calamity. Yet also due to the conservative nature instilled by a childhood of hardship and sacrifice.

 

I knew how to live a minimal lifestyle, but had never been skilled at getting others to see the light of that strategy. Flying solo meant that I didn’t have to convince anyone else.

 

Oddly, I received an epiphany of sorts as household funds dwindled, and I returned to old habits. Saving and scrimping and squeezing out extra meals with creations like beans on toast, noodle tacos, flatbread baked on a pizza pan, or fried bologna sandwiches.

 

I was happier and more hopeful, with nothing.

 

Chasing trophies in a workplace environment often left me feeling fatigued, and humbled by futility. I preached a prescribed dogma of effort and loyalty to employees who were under my supervision. But knew well that the axe might fall, if they were deemed to be expendable. Episodes of corporate membership magnified this conflict in my head. I saw firsthand that platitudes of olden days could go pale in the harsh light of modernity.

 

A familiar theme resonated at each pause on my journey. I had to be in control, or suffer the consequences of living as a serf. A cog in the machinery, faceless and anonymous. Useful to be sure, in that I projected a higher power which was, in truth, not vested in me or any of my subordinates. I served the purpose of a conduit. A trench flowing water. Or a cable delivering electric signals from an instrument to the amplifier. Membership in the proper group made me worthy. The proper class. In that case, those of us who had shown enough discipline and obedience to be charged with minding the store.

 

Compliments from employers sounded sweet to my ears. Yet now, I realize that when saying ‘Good boy!’ to my canine companions, at home, the effect is no different. Through an education of chance, I finally realized that freedom and responsibility are two sides of the same coin. The burden of being in control is a yoke that lies lightly upon my shoulders. Its weight is nothing compared to the heft of crosstalk and static from others, who ride the wagon as spectators, without ever putting their bootheels into the dirt.

 

I used to think that climbing the metaphorical ladder to prosperity was an activity founded in reason. The aspiration of studios folk who view life as something built on a foundation of faith in goodness, and the value of hard work. And indeed, some of those tenets remain. I still believe that my own determination will keep the stone rolling. But have scaled that ambition to succeed downward, into proportions that are humble and local. What I do for myself, what I create in this virtual space, what I whisper to the sunset while enjoying a cold brew, is all worthwhile.

 

I once tried to vocalize this outlook to a friend, who was lamenting his own voyage as a musician having been stalled by new trends in the industry. He confessed to feeling like a failure after spending months on a recording project. Something that was delightful to hear and share with others. I thought his attitude was unnecessarily harsh.

 

“You must have heard the phrase, ‘Make art for art’s sake’ at one point or another. That concept goes back to Paris apparently, in the 19th Century. There is something undeniably French about lifting up a creed of art justifying itself, without any other tangential attachment of politics or philosophy. It matters when a poet composes stanzas of verse. It matters when a painter interprets the sun and moon, and earth below. It matters when a singer adds her voice to the sounds of nature. Why, you ask? Because it does! That is what has propelled human beings throughout recorded history to etch slabs of rock, and carve logs, and build temples. Don’t you get it? Maybe it’s a Buddhist vibe, or perhaps a splinter of wisdom passed forward through the centuries, from Latin scholars. The notion must sound like madness to those that live on the social grid! But not to us, my guitar-plucking compadre. Not to us...”

 

I was never certain if he took my assertion to heart. Or if he understood the relationship between having control and using that privilege to speak freely and honestly. Without making excuses or offering justifications of any kind.

 

But I said it out loud. That alone was enough.

Tuesday, April 30, 2024

Trailer Park Vignettes – “Intifada, Part Two”

 



c. 2024 Rod Ice

All rights reserved

(4-24)

 

 

Townshend Carr Lincoln was used to colorful sights while drinking on his inset porch at Evergreen Estates. A trailer community located east of Cleveland. Emblems that had been repurposed from the Revolutionary War were commonplace. Skulls, and Confederate standards, and leftover campaign materials for Donald Trump hung almost everywhere. Signs that boasted about the merits of Chevrolet, Jeep, Bud Light, and Cummins motors had been nailed to barn walls and pallet fences. Even white crosses stood in gardens and along the perimeter of manicured lawns. None of these symbolic displays caused him to peer through a magnifying glass, for clues. Yet the sight of a Palestinian flag in the front window, next door, made him take notice immediately.

 

He sat with a shooter glass of Tennessee whiskey held in two fingers.

 

“What the hell? When did she put that thing up?”

 

Like the reclusive, bearded hermit, Darcy Trelane had become a fixture in their rural neighborhood. She was fiercely independent and opinionated. Socialist, unapologetically liberal, and unwilling to compromise her values. Though nailing down her core principles could be an exercise in chasing ghosts. She seemed to believe in having a good time with friends, gaming, getting stoned, and little else. Which put her at odds with the whole community of mobile homes. Yet placed her in a narrow groove with the shaggy drunk on her eastern flank.

 

Lincoln was a loner and a Libertarian. His philosophy was non-interference. Only when lured out of the shadows by a nagging soul did he ever express himself vocally. Otherwise, he simply got boozed-up and blitzed, every day. Until inebriation sent him off to a netherworld of nothingness.

 

When he heard voices through the trailer wall, chanting for rebellion, the sound buzzed in his ears like a stray honeybee. He had to tilt sideways on his bench, and listen to be certain of this odd noise, coming across the side yard.

 

“Intifada in America! Capitalist corpses are the real Walking Dead! Intifada! Intifada! Intifadaaaaa!”

 

His eyes felt strangely dry upon listening more carefully. The sensation made him blink and shake his head like a restless canine.

 

“Intifada? What the hell? I thought Miss Poindexter was Polish!”

 

By the afternoon he had reached a point of stagnation in his liquor consumption. The effect of his joy juice had turned stale. So, instead of feeling tipsy or giddy, he went dark. His head dipped as he slid into a groggy state of detachment. But the call of a familiar name shook him from this downhill cascade.

 

“HEYY, LINK! HOW ARE YOU, NEIGHBOR?”

 

Darcy had come outside for a clandestine smoke on her back deck. Sunshine warmed the day with a glow of summer that would soon be fully in bloom.

 

The weary hillbilly rubbed his face, and belched.

 

“Say Miss Dex, I was hoping you might pop out for a breath of fresh air. It’s beautiful out here! I gotta ask though, what’s with the new decoration up front? Did you give up on the pride flag?”

 

She stood, hands on hips, like Wonder Woman facing off with a criminal rogue.

 

“Does it bother you, buddy?”

 

Lincoln shrugged and snorted.

 

“Nah, I don’t give a damn what other people do around here. I just wondered what the motivation was, to go out on that limb. Didn’t your fam make pierogis and play the accordion? I thought you grew up listening to Polka music...”

 

His contact across the green expanse giggled and nodded.

 

“Yeah, that’s right. I used to get pierogis with cottage cheese inside. And baked kielbasa. You ever have anything like that, Link? Grandma made everything from scratch. Grandpa drank Okocim beer, until he couldn’t buckle his belt anymore! No wonder all of us turned out to be on the chunky side!”

 

The alcoholic iconoclast sighed with understanding.

 

“You’ll stir up some shit with that emblem in the window. What’s the angle? I know you ain’t shy about stepping on toes. But this is a different move...”

 

Darcy frowned while thinking. Then hardened her tone.

 

“Have you read about what’s going on over there? Yikes! Thousands and thousands and thousands of people dying. It’s a gawdamm mess! Over here, the college presidents get to lounge with their donors. What about us? What about the kids? What about our free speech? We can’t even pay off our student loans! They’re turning it into material for Fox News! That’s why I invited my feminist friends over, from Tri-C!”

 

Lincoln had turned uncomfortably sober.

 

“Would I sound shallow by saying that you’re a buzzkill right now? Look, I never try to steer people away from what they want to think. It’s your trip. Take it! But I’d think twice on this, are you protesting for a cause, or just to make some noise? Think about where you stand...”

 

Miss Poindexter adjusted her black glasses, and shrugged.

 

“IT’S ALL BECAUSE OF CAPITALISM! IT’S ALL BECAUSE OF GREED AND POWER AND DIRTY DOGS LIKE THE ORANGE MAN! CAN’T YOU SEE IT? THAT SMALL-HANDED IDIOT IS A MENACE! IT’S BECAUSE OF THOSE PEOPLE AT THE CHURCH ON OUR TOWNSHIP SQUARE!”

 

Her neighbor abandoned his drinking vessel, and took a swig of Jack Daniel’s directly from the bottle. The burn made him twitch and grin. But then, he went blank with reflection.

 

“And putting that flag in your front window makes it better? How so?”

 

His young cohort wiped taco crumbs from her pajama pants.

 

“IT’S BETTER BECAUSE I HAD MY SAY!”

 

He smiled thoughtfully and twirled the whiskey container in his fingers.

 

“If that’s what you did, then it’s a good deal. But give it a pondering. Will folks hear what you meant to convey, or get a ring of something else? What notes are you playing? What instrument? A liberty bell, or a bugle for more funerals?”

 

The boisterous BBW was stunned. She fretted with her hair, and T-shirt.

 

“WHAT THE HECK DO YOU MEAN, OLD FART?”

 

Lincoln wiped brew foam from his facial hair.

 

“People always want to battle with each other. They’ve got their reasons, their causes. They’ve got fingers to point. Who started the fight? Who’ll finish it? I’m gonna leave that kind of talk for better minds than my own. What do I know? I’m a freaking boozer. Being conscious and aware frightens the shit out of me. But I’ll tell you this, someday, somehow, you’ve got to quit stirring the pot. Quit making enemies. Quit throwing dirt on the other side. What’s going on in the Middle East is a tragedy. God himself must be weeping. But don’t try to turn that into your own conflagration. Don’t fan the flames. Don’t add wood to the bonfire. Be thankful you are here on this side of the world. Live in peace with others, even if they talk different, and think different, and worship what they recognize as a different creator. Screw all of that nonsense! I’m good with you doing your thing. Let me do mine! Which, as a matter of fact, is going to my kitchen for another round of drinks!”

 

Darcy watched the disabled hobo stumble across his threshold, and disappear. Her face had gone completely red.

 

“I never heard that crusty effer say so much, before! Jinkies, what a speech!”

 

The radical group from Cleveland disbanded, shortly after their host expressed a change of heart about her act of defiance. The front window got it’s third look for that day, now covered by a baby-blue blanket from a shelf in the bedroom closet.

 

Lincoln fell asleep on the raggedy couch, still tasting Tennessee whiskey on his lips.

 

It had been a good day in the country.

 


 

Trailer Park Vignettes – “Intifada”


 


c. 2024 Rod Ice

All rights reserved

(4-24)

 

 

Darcy Trelane grew up in a Cleveland neighborhood where people from diverse cultures had settled over years of immigration and urban renewal. Her personal world-view was shaped by the experience of going to Cuyahoga Community College, and studying for a degree in nursing. This attempt to set a career path went awry as she encountered members of counterculture groups, and artists who lived on the societal fringe. When she joined an organization of LGBT activists on campus, a new episode of self-awareness began. Yet this shift stunned her mainstream family. Eventually, she dropped out of school, and left the proximity of Lake Erie to live with a girlfriend at a rural, residence park situated near Amish country.

 

That hasty decision changed the direction of her life. She had never lived in a mobile home, before.

 

Evergreen Estates was tangentially opposite to the streets where she played as a young girl. The rustic enclave was populated with blue-collar folk who piloted ratty cars and pickup trucks with oversized tires. Citizens who were light on education, but heavy on family ties and American traditions. She had been accustomed to the sight of rainbow banners and protest signs, while pursuing the goal of higher learning. But now her surroundings boasted an assortment of Gadsden flags and Confederate emblems. Diesel motors rattled her windows. Shotgun blasts often woke her from slumber, with morning sessions hunting wild game, in nearby woodlands.

 

Her eyesight had always been poor. But after adopting a pair of thick-framed, black spectacles, she was tagged with the nickname of ‘Miss Poindexter’ in the boxcar community. Her intention had been to play off the vibe of Buddy Holly. Something retro and provocative for a lesbian gamer who had strayed far from native soil, in the city.

 

Eventually, she ditched the healthy guidelines of a vegan lifestyle, and tipped into an excess of eating Ramen and junk food staples, like Mr. Hero and Taco Bell. Her weight swelled dangerously. She dyed her hair a confrontational shade of metallic orange. Then, a new confidence filled her bosom. She organized a Pokemon fan club with kids in the park. Something that immediately made her a hero with disaffected youth, and a suspicious figure for their parents.

 

She put a pride standard in the front window of her longbox dwelling. That single challenge to the normalcy of their distant oasis caused a firestorm of discontent.

 

Linn Speck, who was considered to be a moral arbiter for the entire development, stood with his Trump Bible in front of the Schult singlewide. He had dressed as if going to play golf with friends, in a polo shirt and cargo shorts. The rotund, balding resident shook his fist with outrage, and shouted oaths, before bellowing lyrics from Lee Greenwood. In an atonal vocal style that seemed to have been inspired by the howl of a thirsty mutt left chained to a tree on a hot, summer day.

 

“If tomorrow, all the things were gone I’d worked for all my life

And I had to start again with just my children and my wife

I’d thank my lucky stars to be living here today

‘Cause the flag still stands for freedom, and they can’t take that away

And I’m proud to be an American, where at least I know I’m free

And I won’t forget the men who died, who gave that right to me

And I’d gladly stand up next to you and defend her still today

‘Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land

God bless the USA!”

 

Darcy stood on her back deck, which was enclosed by panels of chain-link fencing. She wore an XXL T-shirt, patterned with an image of the drag icon, Divine.

 

“Linn. Go home already! There’s no point in preaching your MAGA shit to me, I don’t buy any of your dogma. My grandma gave up trying to teach me that crap when I was 14 years old! I loved her, but she was nuts. I think she worked in a munitions factory, during the war...”

 

Her conservative visitor shook his head and spit fire.

 

“DON’T TALK THAT WAY ABOUT GOD! ARE YOU INSANE?”

 

The pudgy femme squeaked with laughter.

 

“What’ll he do, zap my trailer with a bolt of lightning? That’d be awesome, better even than watching the solar eclipse from my window! Holy fugg! That was like something on the Xbox!”

 

Linn held his stomach, which had started to ache.

 

“Miss Dex, you don’t belong in this place. Can I just say that out loud? Go back to Cleveland and be happy. This is a Christian stronghold. We keep things on the straight and narrow here, nobody cares about being politically correct, or woke! I honestly don’t give a damn about hurting your feelings! I don’t give a damn about your trans friends and tie-dye freaks! I don’t give a damn about pot smokers and meth heads!”

 

The university reject cackled, and slapped her curvy thighs.

 

“My dad bought this junker for cash. He’s plugged all the holes, shingled the roof, and replaced the windows. Everything is airtight now! All we owe is lot rent, every month. We couldn’t live anywhere by the lake for what it costs in this dump! So kiss my big ass! I’ll do as I please, when I please! Call the cops if your boxers are in a bunch! Those losers are probably your buddies, anyway!”

 

The stocky agitator stomped his feet and cursed.

 

“It’s appropriate that you live next to Townie Lincoln, the old drunk who bathes once a year. That shaggy son-of-a-bitch is the kind of next-door nobody that you deserve! Who’s a bigger pile of dung? That’s a toss-up, I think! A coin flip to decide! The two of you should have a debate about it!”

 

Darcy shrugged and scratched her belly.

 

“Are you done complaining? Jinkies, listening to you is like having my granny back all over again. Whine, whine, whine! I’ve got to smoke a joint! You’re giving me a headache!”

 

The back door slammed with a rattle of loose weatherstripping. Their brief confrontation had ended.

 

After lodging the formal protest, Linn wobbled back down the street, to his own lot. He rummaged through his storage barn, to find cold cans of Milwaukee’s Best, in a cooler by the back wall. Then, he sat down on a lawn chair, which was waiting in the middle of his driveway.

 

From a distance, he spied the rainbow banner at Darcy’s abode beginning to droop from its spring-loaded rod. This change made him unexpectedly hopeful. Was it a sign that his loud opposition to her amoral habits had produced some sort of positive effect? The thought caused a chill to run over his skin. He pumped his fist toward the sky.

 

“God bless the USA! Just like Lee Greenwood sang!”

 

Suddenly, a new set of colors filled the front window at Lot 12. They were oddly familiar, and steeped in controversy. Yet he could not immediately remember seeing them before. But a moment of reflection cleared his head. And made his eyes go wide with shock.

 

At least a dozen other women were crowded into the small bedroom. Piercings and tattoos gave them the look of attendees at an alternative rally of some sort.

 

He could hear a student chant echoing along their boulevard, from the glorified shipping container where his atheist opponent lived. One that used a word rarely, if ever, spoken in their pastoral county. It turned him numb with disbelief. And soured him on the taste of his brew.

 

“Intifada in America! Capitalist corpses are the real Walking Dead! Intifada! Intifada! Intifadaaaaa!”

 

 

Saturday, April 27, 2024

Nobody Reads This Page - “Cropduster” (“Undefeated, Part Two”)

 



c. 2024 Rod Ice

All rights reserved

(4-24)

 

 

I used to play at least one of my guitars every day. A habit that began during childhood, while experimenting with instruments from my father’s collection. As my own arsenal of plectrum relics grew, I started to record demo tracks on cassette tapes, whenever a creative jones moved me to write. But as career concerns and responsibilities took precedence, I quit doodling with my axes. It seemed right to focus on real issues instead of Rock & Roll dreams. That choice left me feeling gutted and soulless, but yielded a gainful income for many years.

 

Until it didn’t.

 

Disability pushed me over the precipice, into early retirement. When I finally summoned the courage to revisit this first love of many, it produced a moment of stunning self-awareness. Though words and melodies still flowed through my head, and colored the hues of writing projects penned for newspapers, magazines, and books, I no longer had the chops to play.

 

Sitting with a bargain amplifier bought through eBay, and my Fender Telecaster Standard, I was taken down a notch. Or perhaps, two or three...

 

For a long time while out-of-service, I had considered myself to be a fan of Fender products. In discussions online, or casual conversations, I always indicated that this personal tilt remained in effect. Even when talking about guitar history with my friend and mentor Dennis Chandler, who once worked for Gibson as a district manager of some kind. My first electric twanger was a no-name, Teisco offering. A student-sized appliance, made in Japan. Yet heavily influenced by the designs Leo himself had sired. That provided a template which directed my purchases going forward. I found a Swedish, Hagstrom II, which reminded me somewhat of a Jazzmaster. Later came a Peavey T-60, which was a tribute to the venerable Stratocaster. And a Hofner from Germany, which also carried the telltale traits of those noted creations.

 

But in modern terms, I struggled with the workhorse instrument. My late friend Paul Race had fancifully called his own blonde Tele from the 1960’s a ‘Fender Cropduster.’ He inspired me to lust after that kind of no-frills, playing experience. So, finding myself uncomfortable with one of the breed made me confused and disheartened.

 

While snoozing in bed, later that night, I remembered some of the other electrified jammers in my collection. Some force of reason guided me to ponder a black, Gibson Les Paul that had languished in a closet for several years, with boxes of forgotten junk.

 

I wondered and wandered through the dreamscape aimlessly, while counting sheep. What about that guitar? What about trying something totallydifferent?

 

Late in the morning that followed, I finished a pot of coffee and then moved to my desk in the back office. I had managed to retrieve the Gibbo from its exile, and found a cable to plug it into my low-buck amp. With the guitar sitting across my right knee, I clutched at the fretboard. And began to hammer out a simple, Blues riff.

 

This time, my hands were not so numb.

 

I started with a setting of high gain on the Ibanez soundbox, something associated with Punk pioneers who used their Les Paul models to thrash out power chords. Like Steve Jones of the Sex Pistols. But soon, I twisted up a more modest level on the dials. This cleaner tone fit the groove where I had settled. A new sense of confidence bolstered my spirit.

 

Quickly, I crouched over my computer keyboard, and typed out three verses of lyrics. Then, reached for the iPhone in my pocket, and decided to record a first take of what had come to mind.

 

The humiliation of yesterday morphed into a gentler flush of accomplishment, and satisfaction.

 

“Black Les Paul No. 1”

 

Here’s a word to the wise

Peering into the dark abyss

With bloodshot eyes

Here’s a word to the fool

Baited too many times

Into breaking the rules

I know what to say

To dispel demons

On judgment day

I know what to reveal

When the soldiers go slipping

On banana peels

 

Here’s a word to the meek

Flailing without a paddle

Up on Cripple Creek

Here’s a word to the fine

Who have gone up the ladder, lazy

Paying it no mind

I know where to turn

In a forest of trouble trees

That bend, break, and burn

I know how to laugh

When lost and languishing

With my Esso roadmap

 

Here’s a word to the strong

Those who hear this tale of woe

And sing along

Here’s a word to the jester

Leaping around the throne

Of Mister Mister

I know what begins

When the daylight dips deep

And night holds all the pins

I know what to think

When sober days grow heavy

And my soul thirsts for drink.”

 

My recorded work was pedestrian compared to some of the wild fantasies of yonder days. Yet it resonated with worth. After such a long episode of alienation from my creative self, I took heart in being able to play, once again. Having saved the audio file, I attached it to a series of e-mail messages, and shared it with friends. This act rendered a more immediate sense of gratification than compiling cassette volumes of my demos, and mailing them at the post office. Something I used to do when my studio was a basement room, filled with vinyl records and collectible trinkets.

 

After finishing this musical endeavor, I sat with a brew on my front porch. A reflective mood made me consider that after a lifetime of beholding the Telecaster as a sort of holy grail, I had now reached a point where that axe no longer felt good in my hands. Murmuring a silent prayer, I asked my late cohort from Corning, New York for forgiveness.

 

Then, I recalled that my first truly competent guitar was a Kent, crafted in tribute to Gibson’s most iconic model. That sunburst, humbuckered, note-harvester was buried in a closet, next to the bathroom. I hadn’t taken it out to play in years.

 

Unwittingly, I had traced a circle from that day in my youth, to the here and now. From the first moment when I slung the LP copy over my shoulder, to the point of being stooped and slowed by age.

 

My journey came with the flip of a power switch, and the stroke of a pick. And my own ‘Cropduster’ sitting in a corner by the file cabinet.