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While writing my Chevette book, I did plenty of research and reminiscing about the car, and its status as a flawed icon of automotive history. Many memories lingered of piloting my undersized beast around the roads of northeastern Ohio. But perhaps the most insight came from a brochure printed to inform potential customers about this bygone product. It matched the year of my own hatchback sedan, 1981. Inside were glossy photographs, and blocks of breezy text obviously penned by an ad department brimming with hyperbole.
I had to smile broadly when reading their description of the vehicle.
“One tough small car that’s really going strong. That’s Chevette. And no wonder. America’s best-selling small car has proved itself. From one coast to the other. Chevette’s exhibited solid durability in real-life use for over five years. Traditional Chevrolet quality is designed into this car. Chevette takes it from there with a host of specifics. Full Coil suspension. Extensive anti-corrosion treatments. Double-panel door, hood and deck lid construction. We could go on and on. Yes, every hard-working Chevette starts from pretty sturdy stock. But it doesn’t rest on its laurels. New refinements in Chevette for 1981 make this tough performer even better. Take the new Computer Command Control system for example. This new on-board computer helps monitor engine functions to reduce exhaust emissions and provide the kind of fuel economy that Chevette’s known for. For style, Chevette looks even better with its new contemporary flush-mounted windshield. Extra glamor comes standard with new sporty styled wheels and a bright-accented black grille on both Coupe and Sedan models. Inside 1981 Chevette Coupe and Sedan get the added appeal of a sport shifter. And it’s housed in a handy and handsome floor console. These features join the long list of traditional Chevette standards that continue to make it a lot of car for the money. It all adds up. To a hefty sum of sporty good looks, long-lasting quality and dependability – without a hefty price tag. That’s 1981 Chevy Chevette. That’s one tough son of a gun. ‘For Chevette EPA estimated mileage, check the wall poster displayed at your Chevrolet dealer’s showroom, or ask for an EPA mileage sheet to take home with you.’”
That core assertion made me laugh out loud. And, wipe tears from my eyes.
“ONE TOUGH SON OF A GUN!”
In parts of the country where salt never touched metal, during winter months, perhaps the lifespan of such products might have been longer. But my own experience was that the floorboards of my little Chevy disintegrated quickly. Corrosion treatments? I never thought it likely that anything special had been done to my boxy rig. Tough and dependable? I suppose such adjectives might come to mind when remembering that my Chevette was still running, albeit in wounded fashion, on three cylinders. Right before it was carried away by a wrecker.
But I never, ever thought it looked sporty.
“A word about this catalog. We have tried to make this catalog as comprehensive and factual as possible and we hope you find it helpful. However, since the time of printing, some of the information you will find here may have been updated. Also, some of the equipment shown or described throughout this catalog is av available at extra cost. Your dealer has details and, before ordering, you should ask him to bring you up to date. The right is reserved to make changes at any time, without notice, in prices, colors, materials, equipment, specifications, and models. Check with your Chevrolet dealer for complete information.”
If truth-in-advertising laws were rigorously applied in those days, the resulting slogan might have been more candid, and direct.
“HEY, AT LEAST IT AIN’T A GAWDAMM YUGO!”
“Make Chevette your own. It’s easy. Start with the basic Chevette you want. It’s already packed with a host of sporty standard features. Now pick and choose from the many options listed below... “
GM had always been a market leader in producing vehicles with plenty of available extras. So, it was no surprise that even their lowly econobox could be obtained with many bonus features. Surprisingly, a V-6 version was apparently tested as an ‘off-road’ alternative, but never officially produced. Car and Diver Magazine described it as being ‘By the insane, for the insane.’ A 2.8 L powerplant elevated the coupe from 70 horsepower to 135.
“A word about engines. Chevettes are equipped with GM-built engines produced by the Chevrolet Motor Division. Please refer to the Chevette power team information on page 9 of this catalog or see your dealer for details.”
My own edition of the breed was incredibly economical to operate. Yet it offered lackluster performance as a tradeoff. Pulling up steep hills, especially if rolling with a load in the back, could be challenging. It was always best to build inertia beforehand.
“A word about assembly, components and optional equipment in these Chevrolets. The Chevettes described in this catalog are assembled at facilities of General Motors Corporation operated by the GM Assembly Division. These vehicles incorporate thousands of different components produced by various divisions of General Motors and by various suppliers in General Motors. From time to time during the manufacturing process, it may be necessary, in order to meet public demand for particular vehicles or equipment, or to meet federally-mandated emissions, safety and fuel economy requirements, or for other reasons, to produce Chevrolet products with different components or differently sourced components than initially scheduled. All such components have been approved for use in Chevrolet products and will provide the quality performance associated with the Chevrolet name...”
My tiny T-car was admittedly a budget item. The fit and finish were uninspiring. Interior plastic looked and felt cheap. Even with Armor All detailing, it still had the pale sheen of a Walmart shopping cart. The overall design was frugal, as intended. Not cosmetically attractive. But, at such a low price-point, that truth did not really matter.
In that distant era, early in the 1980’s decade, I just needed something that would start every morning and get me to work.
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